Angry

Today has turned into a pretty angry day for me and I needed a place to vent.

If I could punch cancer in the face...I would.  I know I am not alone in that either.

Cancer affects way too many lives and I just hate it, plain and simple.

Having said that, I do know that everything happens for a reason.

It just hard sometimes to see the reasons through our pain and anguish.

We have learned today that the doctors are giving my grandpa 2 months, and I am angry about that.

I know that we all have to die, and I am not worried about him in that respect.  He will be going to paradise and be able to be with so many loved ones who have already made it there.  

I suppose my anger comes because I am being selfish.

I am not ready to say goodbye to him in this life.

I am not ready to just remember him and not have him at special occasions.

I am not ready to watch him go through pain and suffering.
I think my anger may come from feeling guilty as well.
Guilty that I was able to beat cancer, and my grandpa- like so many others-will not have that opportunity.

So today I am just angry.

I will eventually be able to move past this anger and I will do that with help from above.

But for today...I get to be angry.

*On a much happier note:  our cute Emma Kay found out today that she will be serving on the Student Council at her school next year.  She is so excited and I am very excited for her.  It's been a very bittersweet day in the Ogden household.