First to Last

It was very interesting yesterday getting my last Red Devil treatment.
It was very different than the first.

First feelings:
*A little nervous and anxious from the unknown
*Relieved to finally be doing something to get rid of the cancer
*Not particularly scared of the red substance they are putting inside me
*Felt pretty good all things considered for most of the following days

Last feelings:
*Dreaded going to the treatment center
*Hating all of the familiar smells
*Dragging my feet everywhere we go
*Not as talkative to the sweet nurses and doctors who work there
*Could not even look at any of the meds they were putting in me without feeling ill
*Couldn't wait until it was over with so I could go home to bed


Usually on the night of my treatment I don't feel too badly. But that wasn't the case last night. Last night I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I was downing my nausea pills even though I had been pumped full of anti-nausea meds before the chemo. And I still felt like I was going to throw up- I didn't, thank goodness- but that was the closest I have been during this whole time. I was down and out for the count.
Good thing I have wonderful people lined up to bring dinners,
an amazing husband who takes good care of me,
equally amazing kids who are patient with this whole situation and still go through the nightly routine without mom helping.

Today I feel much better. I am very tired. My red blood count is lower than it has been. I will get it checked again next week and will hopefully be up more so they don't have to do a blood transfusion. (Yuck.)

But I am so happy to say that I am done with the "RED DEVIL"!
Step 2 completed. (Step 1 was the Lumpectomy just in case you were wondering :)
I will have another PET scan next Thursday to see how much progress we made in killing these little cancer buggers.
I have dreams at night that the scan shows absolutely nothing and the doctor says, "Well it looks like we won't have to do the next round of chemo."
Ya- only in my dreams will that happen. But it would be a nice dream to come true for sure.

I also have a little change in the original schedule of things (just in case anybody cares).
I was going to do chemo, radiation, surgery.
But after talking to 4 amazing doctors- oncologist, surgeon, plastic surgeon, and radiation oncologist- we have decided that the better route will be
chemo, surgery, radiation and a few months down the road- completed surgery.

That means that once I finish with the next round of chemo in February, I will wait 4-6 weeks for my immune system to recover somewhat. Then I will have the mastectomy- one or both- I haven't decided yet. It is completely up to me if I want them to take the healthy side and I really am struggling with this decision. But that's for another blog post.
During the mastectomy, the plastic surgeon will insert spacers to save space for the implants that will eventually make their new home there.
Then I will have 6 weeks of radiation- 5 days a week.
Then we will wait 1-3 months to see how my skin and muscle recovers from the radiation and I will have another surgery to replace the spacers with implants.
THEN- my journey with cancer will be pretty much complete.

So I still have kind of a long road ahead, but we are making progress for sure.
I almost forgot about my little cancer score board.
So last time it wasDes (& family & friends)- 80 Cancer- 4
I would have to say that cancer has scored a couple more points just because it made me have to have chemo which makes me feel yucky- but I am finished with one round and I have had so many acts of kindness from my friend and family that we get a lot more points.
Des, family & friends- 100 Cancer- 6 
Sa-weet! I like that scoreboard!
Here's to kicking that cancer out of here!